If you've recently separated or in the process of a divorce or are contemplating
making this decision, here are some things you may think about and some areas
of your finances to consider evaluating.
- First of all, I'm here to help you as best as I can! During my years
as a real estate agent I have helped many couples sell a home when their marital
or family situation has changed.
- You can be confident that I will give you the best advice possible and then
it's up to you to make the best decision for yourself and your situation.
- In the midst of all this heavy emotional and financial turmoil, what you
need most is some non-emotional, straightforward, specific information and
answers. Once you know how a divorce affects your home, your mortgage
and taxes, critical decisions are easier. Neutral, third party information
can help you make logical, rather than emotional, decisions. That's
what I am here for and I will do my best to help you through these times.
- Probably the first decision is whether you want to continue living in the
house. Will the familiar surroundings bring you comfort and emotional
security, or unpleasant memories? Do you want to minimize change by
staying where you are, or sell your home and move to a new place that offers
a new start?
- Only you can answer those questions, but there will almost certainly be
some financial repercussions to your decision process. What can you
afford? Can you manage the old house on your new budget? Is refinancing
possible? Or is it better to sell and buy a new house and make a fresh
start? How much house can you buy on your new budget?
- You will find me fair and honest and I will give expert advice and timely
information to help you.
- I will answer all your questions honestly and if I do not know the answer
to your question I will find out for you or refer you to someone who will
know the answer.
- Sure I can get into the middle of things and sometimes it can get a little
hot, but I will continue to help you in a calm and professional manner
and keep things progressing as smooth as possible.
- I am here to help you get through this difficult time with the least amount
of 'extra' hassles... you're under enough strain and pressure as it is, you
have to make the first step and contact me and I will help you through these
Call me at 905-828-3434 or email
me in confidence.
10 Tips on whether to stay in your home together during your
- Have there been any incidents of physical or verbal abuse? If so,
separate in order to avoid future situations which could spark violent incidents.
- Are you able to communicate on basic issues such as mowing the lawn and
paying bills? If not, even small things may escalate tensions unnecessarily,
making life miserable.
- Is there a reasonable housing alternative for the spouse who will be moving
out? If you have children, is that housing alternative close enough to the
children's school and neighbourhood that spending time with both parents is
easily arranged? If you stay a bit longer, can you make a permanent move,
avoiding a temporary move in the meantime?
- Can you afford to separate? Or do you need to live together to economize
and save for the day of inevitable separation? If you stayed together for
a few months, could you pay off some of your jointly accumulated debt?
- If you have children, are you able to behave civilly to your spouse? If
you cannot model positive, adult behavior in front of your children, you risk
increasing the stress they experience from the divorce. You also risk alienating
them from you. Even if you feel your spouse causes the problems, not you,
consider separating for the good of the children. What's best for them is
not always what's cheapest or most convenient for you.
- Do you want to keep the house after the divorce, and your spouse does not
(or vice versa)? Consider encouraging your spouse to move out by "giving"
him or her the deposit for an apartment from marital funds, without asking
for reimbursement at the end of the divorce.
- Will moving out of your family home trigger an unanticipated consideration?
Is there another home or property that will cause tax implications? Consult
a tax specialist to be sure.
- Can you both respect each other's privacy while staying in the same home?
Can you stay emotionally separated while living together, without being tempted
to "spy" on each other? Are you at the emotional point where you
won't react to phone conversations you accidentally overhear, and you won't
be tempted to steam open your spouse's mail? Will staying together create
a situation of mistrust, making it more difficult for the two of you to resolve
your divorce settlement later?
- Are you able to agree on how bills and house expenses will be paid during
the waiting period before your divorce is finalized, as well as temporary
division of parenting time parenting time with your children? Assuming you've
considered items 1-8 above, and you're able to agree on how to handle things
on a temporary basis, separation may make sense. If you don't agree, and resolving
these issues will require more time for decision-making, consider staying
- Is there a legal presumption in your local court about separating that the
judge will consider as part of your final divorce? Before you make any important
decisions you'll want to ask a lawyer about the specifics of your jurisdiction.
There are thousands of good web sites with information on separation and/or
Dealing With Separation and Divorce - From the Government of Ontario Website, excellent resources on these issues
The following information and Web sites will help you understand the legal issues and processes of separation and divorce in Ontario. Before making critical decisions, you should understand your rights and obligations and the services that are available to help you. Using these links, you will be able to find information about issues that may be important to you, including the care and support of your children, support for you or your spouse/partner and the division of your property. You will also find information about how to find a lawyer and resolve legal issues.
This resource is not intended to offer legal advice. For legal advice consult a lawyer.
Some other items you may want to consider:
- Review your tax withholding status at your job. If you become 'single' again
you will have to determine if you're having the right amount withheld from
your paycheck by your employer. If you have too much taken out of your paycheck,
you'll lose the use of that money until you get your tax refund. Have too
little withheld, and you might have to pay a penalty.
- Don't forget to update your insurance needs. Perhaps you need more (because
you have reduced the number of insured people or even possibly added to your
brood), maybe you need a different type of insurance or maybe you can consolidate
your policies with the same company to save money. Call your Insurance Agent
for more information.
- Update your will, emergency contacts, and beneficiaries. Your legal papers
should keep pace with every change in your family situation. You don't want
your ex-spouse to inherit your house, nor do you want your new bundle of joy
to lose their legacy. Besides updating your will, change the beneficiaries
you declared on all your retirement accounts and insurance policies.
Contact a lawyer to make these changes legal.
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